Before recording the advert again I edited the script, using Celtx. I Edited the script because in the feedback i received from my group of 23-30 year old males and females, I was told that the sentences need to be shorter. Below is my new Script:
Voice over:
Does the news usually sound like this to you?
*gibberish talk for (about) 10 seconds of the advert*
Voice over:
Well with the South London Shout, you are now able to actually understand what is going on in your community. With all the latest news, business, sport and even recommendations on where to spend your weekends! This local newspaper will connect you to your community in a way you have never experienced.
Approx. 30 secs
So I asked a teacher to help me record it. We recorded it and she told me that instead of using the gibberish I created I could take one of my old recordings and play it backward, this will still cause the audience to be confused by what is going on. We edited the sound in ProTools.
Below is the final radio advert. I think this appeals to my demographic much more than the previous one because the voice I am using is of someone that fits that profile.
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